battlships:

wombatking:

morthils:

stillisee:

aro-as-in-straight-as-a:

thegoodjanet:

izzy-almighty:

hot take: jake peralta is bi and john mulaney plays his ex boyfriend from high school in season six of brooklyn nine-nine

john mulaney plays a rockin’ twink

John Mulaney: *to himself* What would Leonard Bernstein do?

Captain Holt: *to Jake, quietly* I support your and Amy’s relationship with my whole heart but why on earth would you give up a man like that

I don’t even go here (just like… my toes) and I want this, specifically with all these tages from @bosstoaster

#The episode would be Amy getting jealous not of John and Jake but that he has so many interests in common with Holt#So she spends the whole time trying to win back the Captain#Meanwhile Rosa is on a warpath at Jake#Because she told HIM about her sexuality and stuff and had EMOTIONS#And he didn’t tell HER#How DARE he

“look, it’s not like i hid anything, it just never came up!” 

“You called yourself out for ‘straighsplaining’“ 

the whole bi thing goes completely over charles’ head and he keeps getting really aggro like “oh you and jake were real close huh?? too bad, sucker jake is MY best friend!” 

everybody else is like “charles no” 

at the end john mulaney turns out to be the embezzler they’ve been looking for

He was embezzling for an obscure animal charity and the jury lets him off. The squad knows they’ll be seeing him again one day.

He later turns out to be dating Doug Judy.

vr4300:

cornrowe:

literally what about the “it’s leif erickson day!!” bit from spongebob was so impactful that we all just have the phrase hinga dinga durgen permanently drilled into our cerebral cortex. it was 5 seconds long

all millennials have a brain-accessible SD card in their spine containing every SpongeBob episode from the 90s and nothing else

rtahuniverse:

wahbegan:

acciowine:

imthehuggernaut:

kurosmind:

catwithbenefits:

funfetti-cakke:

starfleetrambo:

magnolia-noire:

logynnrose:

weavemama:

MILLENNIALS ARE BLAMED FOR EVERYTHING IT’S GETTING SO OLD

The Black Death wasn’t transmitted by rats. It was transmitted by millennials.

millennials shot versace

millennials killed off the dinosaurs

Millennials shot Archduke Franz Ferdinand of Austria and Sophie, Duchess of Hohenberg.

Cain was a millennial

Millennial caused the Great Permian Extinction

The Titanic didn’t hit an iceberg. It collided with floating colony of ocean millennials.

Millennials stabbed Caesar. 

10 Surprising Historical Genocides You May Not Realize Millennials Were Responsible For

Millennials are ruining Congress